I reconsidered my plan. I’m good, but I’m not super hamster. The fall is too far and I’m liable to end up breaking a critical part of my body if I jump unaided.

I spent the last day building my chute. Let me tell you, it’s not easy to knit a parachute out of sawdust and a paper towel tube but it is possible.

The ramp is dropped. I stand up. Hooked up. Shuffled to the door.

I. Am. Going. To. DIE.

 Deep breaths. Go. Go Go!

Hoollyyy shiiiittttt!

Feet and knees together.

Pull risers. Balls of feet, calves, ugh!

Ow. Crap.

Okay okay. Released the risers. I’m breathing. This is good.

Feet, all four of them? Yep.

Back? Not broken. Holy crap, I made it. I didn’t even crack a claw. Awesome.

Now to hide the evidence. (stashes parachute behind the file cabinet). Freedom. Sweet Freedom.

Holy hell what’s that sound? 

It sounds too much like claws on the floor. I’ve got to stop writing in this damn journal and hide. More later. If the black devil doesn’t eat me.