When I was in Iraq and before I’d really known what it meant to be a full time writer, I was never really sure why people said they didn’t have time to read other people’s manuscripts. I had plenty of time in Iraq. I figured I’d have less when I got home but it would be okay.

I’d even started a group blog, geared toward writers of military romance novels. I’d had a bunch of writers commit and then one by one, they started slowly backing away. I’m not complaining, I was one of the ones who backed away. I’m shamed to realize just how wrong I was about the amount of time blogging takes from every day life. Even my own blog is suffering lately as I try to find things to write about that are still relevant to writing and military life. So today, I’m sad to announce that Romance Roll Call will be fading away, like so many other blogs. My own personal blog will continue and I’ll leave the site up for as long as the hosting contract continues but at the end of it, I won’t be renewing it.

As things have settled down with my children and my family, there’s less to talk about. As I’ve made the transition from lieutenant to captain, there’s more self censorship. Oh, there’s things I’m dying to talk about, but can’t or won’t. I know. I’ve never been a paragon of self restraint but what do you know, we all change and grow. The writing continues at a depressingly slow pace, primarily because by 10 pm, I’m a pumpkin and can barely keep my eyes open. I’ve given up reading any digests from any of the RWA groups I belong to and I’m lucky to respond to emails at this point. I feel guilty for letting all of that slide but at the same time, I honestly can’t do it all and something’s got to give.

Most of all, I miss books. I’ve been on a non fiction glomb for months now and every time I pick up fiction, nothing has been really yarding on me to sit and finish a book.

I’m struggling to keep the writing going, honestly. At the end of the day, the ideas are building up because I don’t have the time to get them all down. I think part of it is because I’m in a period of transition and have been for the last 60 days or so. Hopefully, things will settle down. There will be more on the blog coming on army leadership in the next few weeks as well as making the transition into company command and mentorship.

And I’ll get there. I’ve worked to hard to finally have an agent who loves my ideas and gets the way I think. I’ve worked too hard to have made it through RWA nationals for the first time to slink away now because its too challenging. And I’ve worked too hard to step back from company command and say I can’t do this. I have a chance to really make a difference with a commander who wants to make a difference. How can I pass any of that up?

The balancing act continues. I’ll make it work. And hey, at least my kiddos like to read and write, too.